shidsterlove ; letters to you
well, well, well
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dear diary,
i’m absolutely really sorry that i have neglected you all this while. i’m not doing it on purpose, it’s just that as usual, things have been so crazy and i’ve been so busy and i absolutely have no time for you. i’ve been wanting to post here for a while but unfortunately i was just out of inspiration. mind blank. and i didnt want to post random things just because i felt very random. you were supposed to be the one thing in my life that remained constant. and i’m sorry i didnt follow through with that. besides all that, i’ve just been pulling out my hair on my work and i’m so stressed. i have so many things to share about! so many random quirky moments to blog about, and so many many many other personal things. but where do i start and how do i start?
the last that i left off, was when valentine’s day was coming and i said i had a trick up my sleeve. well, unfortunately that part of the sleeve tore and well things didnt happen the way i wanted it to. but i had fun. we went to jacks place for lunch and walked around a bit, caught a movie which for the first time in areally long while we both really enjoyed and put 5thumbs up! (btw, it’s adam sandler’s and jennifer anniston’s movie Just Go With It) and day before that we actually took a trip to sentosa, and went down the boardwalk.. picture taking! it was fun! it was a non-spending weekend, ‘cept for the jacks place part.. which i tell you the steak were excellent! i love the fact that he does whatever i want to do, albeit begrudgingly, and yet doesnt want to admit, up till this day that he enjoyed it! tssssk, men and their ego.
we’ve been planning for another holiday this year, the last we went was to batam, and we settled to skip my birthday holiday this year, miniscule birthday plans, and go for a short trip to bangkok in may ( i hear ka-ching on may 1st! free money by the Big G!), and a super long one to bali in october for our anniversary! yippeeyaieyay! i’m so sexcited, HEHEHEHHEHE! but also at the same time, i’ll be… caps lock on BROKE! which means, i gotta be working really hard if i want to go on those trips. i’ve planned out something in advance for his birthdya already.. let’s hope this works, yes baby if you’re reading this, I”M THE MASTER PLANNER. i’ve begun planning, have you even thought of what to get for me? HEHHEHE.
speaking of working harder, i got to get my move on, it seems to be i’ve been stood up way too many times, but i guess i have to put in a little bit more effort as well! talk of which i have a potential big client who i shall name him Bob the Builder! and damn, if i get him, these are the things i would do…
1) settle loans
2)give my mother 1/3 of what i get
3) do porting for Gonzales, so he can send me to work faster
4) set aside money for Bali trip for both of us, all expenses and food and accomodation and flight
and thus, INSYAALLAH. =)
… oh crap, got to rush out some docs.. till next time! which will be soon, i hope.
you know you love me,
xoxo, Shid
first post in 2011
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i know i am 30 days too late, but happy new year!
new year’s eve is so disappointing each year that to usher in 2011 this year, i chose to forgo the celebrations, and stayed home, all curled up in my bed watching two and a half men episodes on my trusty laptop (btw, i have named my laptop sookee). So sookee kept me company that night, and when midnight came, i was happily getting my beauty sleep. boring? definitely. slow night? definitiely. but i i still enjoyed every bit of that sleep. oh and yeah, i did attend a pre new years eve party though the night before with my colleagues and i was super drunk but that’s another story.
on the 1st, aishah got engaged. envy much? kinda, but i dealt with that. the week after, my cousin got engaged and yesterday, another cousin’s engagement. i wonder when it will be my turn? perhaps a long way more from now.
abit of a disappointing month this month with work but it will not get me down! i aim to achieve whatever goals i have already set! and by the way talking about goals, i’m gonna have to break a pact i made with my dearest. four months is definitely a long time to go without it, and it’s only been close to two weeks, and i’m starting to get cranky, and i’m picking fights with him and i’m having trouble sleeping. so no. I AM GONNA BREAK THAT PACT. i think i am having withdrawal symptoms so bad that it is affecting my work. definitely. we cannot go against nature. it is intended that a man and a woman must do what they must and if we dont, we are going against the course of nature, the natural order of things will not work and many things will go wrong. case in point? my work is gojng down the drain…….. and thus to solve this, the pact must be broken and my pipes must be cleaned(hehehhehe).
so many things that i actually want to say and write.. about my encounter with the boy i first lost my peaches to recently.. or my trip to chiang mai where i saw things i’d never wish to see again, or about a phone call i had late one night that was weird and awkward and surprising or how much i missed the boy when he left me and go kl. baaaaaaaaaaahhh, but i am not going too.. lets save this for the “along the way” posts.
ohhhh and ooooh valentines day is coming up.. and i got a trick up my sleeve for the boy.
heheheh, i hope it will turn out alright as planned.. hopefully. well till then.. stay tuned.
xoxo,
Shid.
cut and print.
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i have made excuses for my inability to do it, i have blamed my friends miss inspiration for her disappearance and mister procrastination for continuously wanting to hang out, i even stooped so low as to blame the ex-boyf for taking away my muse, my passion, my want to it. i argued with doctor reason that professor focus did not teach me right; he kept on causing ideas to swirl around in my head, i could never stick to one. i used work, minor matters, school, family, friends, lack of time, friendster, facebook, you-tube, google, the worldwideweb as a shield for the blank piece of paper/document.. i blamed everything and everyone, except myself.
but today, today is different.
today i shall admit that it is all my own doing. nothing to do with anything else. procrastination merely played devil’s advocate, i myself was the one who couldnt do it.
i’m just waiting for the moment when i am hit by it.
and newsflash; the moment is here.
